Boise to Colorado: Cindy's Perspective

We bit a sad farewell to Boise on Sunday, July 13th (sniff, sniff) and headed straight for Salt Lake City (SLC).  In an effort to plan our day, I consulted trusty old Trip Advisor.  Yikes!!!! The 15 most popular attractions contained the word "temple".  I'm just guessing,  but I think that the Trip Advisor feedback for SLC comes primarily from vacationing Mormons.

There was NO WAY we were going to spend the day driving from temple to temple looking at exterior architecture (because non-Mormons are not allowed to enter).  After careful consideration, we determined that SLC was not the best vacation fit for us.  We stopped for a light lunch and blew right out of there as quick as possible continued on our way (temple sights unseen).

Being the flexible travelers that we are, Cheech and I  decided that this was the perfect opportunity to begin camping.  A quick consultation with the internet gave us our new direction.  Uinta Wasatch National Forest was perfect!  It was kind-of on our route to Colorado, and as stated on Wikipedia, consisted of "more than 2 million acres of forested mountain lands".  Surely we would find the perfect camping spot.

We missed it... yes that's right we missed the whole d*** 2 million acres of forested mountain lands.  Something clearly went went awry (I think the signage was poorly executed).  Before we knew it Uinta Wasatch National Forest was nothing more than an unfilled camping dream and we were entering the town of Price City, Utah - population 8,621.  I'm sure that number was inflated.

Price City has two hotels:  The Pillow Talk Motel, rooms rented by the hour a hotel whose glory days have long since passed and National 9 Price, where you can rent a questionable room for 59.00 a night.    We went with the National 9 Price for 59.00 (breakfast included).

The scenic view from our room

After a quick check-in, Cheech and I headed off to the market to buy some booze (which I REALLY needed if I was going to face National 9 for the night).  Guess what - no booze for sale in Utah's grocery stores.  You can buy a "low-alcohol beer" that has less than a 3.5 percent ability to inebriate the drinker.   Here's what we found... Polygamy Porter.  I took a picture because I was afraid no one would believe me.

Polygamy Porter- on the grocery shelf. 

Polygamy Porter was just not going to have enough alcohol to get me as drunk relaxed as I needed... so off we went in search of a restaurant where I could get a glass of wine.  We found a sweet little eatery (right next to the Sudsy Duz laundromat).  Here's how the ordering went:  

Me:  I'd like a glass of red wine.

Waitress:  O.K.  And what are you having to eat?

Me: Nothing, just the glass of wine...maybe two.

Waitress:  You have to order food.

Me: I don't want food.  I just want wine.

Waitress:  We can't serve you alcohol unless you order food.

Me: Are you telling me I can't just order a glass of wine?  (I'm a little slow on the uptake.)

Waitress: That's right, you HAVE TO HAVE  food with your alcohol.

Me:  Gee thanks Mom, I'll have chips salsa and two glass of wine!

She did not appreciate my attempt at humor.  She brought the chips, salsa, and wine.  Cheech did not drink his glass of wine because he thought I pissed her off she may have misinterpreted my lighthearted humor for biting sarcasm.  He was concerned that as soon as we left the restaurant she would call the police and have him arrested for drinking and driving.  (I think that was a distinct possibility.)

Side Note:  Utah law forbids restaurants from serving alcohol to any person not ordering food.  Apparently the Utah legislature wishes to ensure that alcoholism and gluttony go hand-in-hand.  

So... I had the two glasses of wine (Cheech ate the chips),  I got just tipsy enough to ignore the minor flaws in our room at the National 9, and all was well (except Cheech never did get a drink).  And so goes the story of our first night of camping.  The great adventure continues!